


Pickup

by SamCyberCat



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Grim Reaper Haru, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-12-22
Packaged: 2019-01-27 09:36:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12578828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamCyberCat/pseuds/SamCyberCat
Summary: The grim reaper currently known as Haru had collected many souls in his time. But none of them were like Nagisa.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Halloween! The 2017 Free! Halloween art inspired me to write grim reaper Haru, so here's some light NagiHaru.

By the time death arrived, the car was a smoking mess, crashed against a cliff side between two towns. It might take a while before it would be found, but given the amount of Halloween parties on tonight, Nagisa doubted that it. There'd be people on the roads.

That was where Nagisa had been – on the road, driving from one Halloween party to the next. It had been a good night. But in retrospect, now that Nagisa could look down on his body from an angle that he hadn't been able to before, the pumpkin bloomers hadn't been a good idea. What was he thinking?

It then occurred to him that he was still thinking at all, despite being several feet away from his own body. That was probably a bonus. Maybe most people weren't thinking by this point.

At that point death took a form, based on an understanding of Nagisa that it'd had even before it arrived on the scene. When Nagisa turned around, he was faced with a young man who had black hair and was dressed in a dark robe, carrying a scythe. There was no doubt who the man was.

“Huh. I wasn't expecting you to be so pretty,” Nagisa said.

“This is the form you've chosen me to take. Usually I'm a skeleton,” said Death, the word now capitalised since he had taken a form.

“Would you be more comfortable as a skeleton?” Nagisa asked.

“It makes no difference to me,” said Death. Because it didn't.

“Okay then... I think I'll keep you as a pretty boy, because that's kind of nice. And I'm going to call you Haru, since I'm guessing I can give you a name as well,” Nagisa said.

“You can,” replied Haru.

With that decided, Nagisa looked from Haru to the wreckage of the car and back again. He had so many questions. It was a good thing that Haru generally had the answers.

“So... death. Should I... wait a while? See if anyone comes to find my body?” Nagisa decided to ask, after a pause.

“That is your choice. You can stay here as long as you like. You can stay here forever, if that is what you want,” said Haru, although he knew that wasn't what Nagisa wanted.

“Nah, that'd be boring,” Nagisa dismissed, “Besides, I bet you've got a lot of other places to be.”

“I am needed everywhere,” Haru confirmed.

“Must be a busy job. I'm surprised you have time for this kind of personal service, what with so many people dying all the time,” said Nagisa.

“Time is a human construct. I can be everywhere and I can be here. I can be right now, while I am also next week and ten years in the past,” Haru said.

“Maaaan, I wish I had that excuse back when I was taking my exams,” Nagisa whistled, “Okay, so death, taking the form of a pretty grim reaper because that's apparently something that I'm into.” He then looked past Haru, to where Haru's steed was waiting; “...Is that only a giant, white seahorse because I imagined it'd be that way, too? Because I always figured that the grim reaper would come on a regular horse.”

“I like seahorses. His name is Binky,” said Haru. There could be no more universal truth than that.

“Okay, cool! Binky it is,” Nagisa said, with a nod. Then, because even in death Nagisa felt a need to fill the silence, he added, “So this is what death is then? I get to choose what happens? That sounds pretty convenient.”

“You have already chosen what happens. You believed in yourself this was where you would be, so here you are,” said Haru, “If you had truly believed in yourself that there was nothing, then there would be just that.”

“And that means... I get to choose what comes next as well?” said Nagisa.

“Correct.”

“Hmm... You've kind of put me on the spot here,” hummed Nagisa, though he had a feeling that Haru would tell him he'd done nothing of the sort, “Heaven or Hell and all that? Well, I know myself and I know that I'd get bored in Heaven, but Hell seems a bit much to commit to and wandering around watching my friends get old would just make me sad.”

“Those are three of your options,” Haru agreed.

Nagisa narrowed his eyes; “I guess you're gonna tell me that I've got an eternity of options.”

“Correct.”

“That's not very helpful!” Nagisa scolded.

He walked around Haru and over to Binky, who watched quietly. As Nagisa approached, Binky whinnied in a way that was a lot more like a horse than a seahorse, but Nagisa assumed that was only because he'd imagined it to be that way. Now that he thought about it, Nagisa wasn't even sure how seahorses sounded. Did they even make any noises at all? Probably not.

“You're the most interesting thing here,” said Nagisa, not making it clear if he was talking about Haru or Binky.

But Haru knew. He always knew.

“Many have devoted their lives to the study of me, though mostly on how to avoid me or bring me upon others,” said Haru.

“I meant your seahorse,” Nagisa said.

Haru also knew that Nagisa would claim he was talking about the seahorse. He said nothing.

“Right... so I want to have fun,” Nagisa told him, “I don't want to spend the rest of eternity sitting around getting whatever I want and being bored. But I also don't want eternal suffering. I just want to have a good time. Are you a good time, Haru?”

“I am the wildest of times,” Haru confirmed, in a voice of total indifference.

“Then I've got my answer right there! I'm coming with you,” Nagisa announced. But then he hesitated and added, “...At least, you're going to create the illusion of me coming with you, because that's what I want. I suppose that once this is all over, you'll just go back to being a concept, huh?”

“You learn fast,” said Haru, “But even right now, I am a concept.”

“Then that's just annoying! I don't want to spend eternity living a lie either,” huffed Nagisa, sticking out his cheeks.

“You are not living a lie any more than you would be regardless of what comes next. What you choose will become the truth for you. If you want to stay with me, then I will be your Death,” Haru said.

“Oh wow... that's the most romantic thing anyone's told me all night,” said Nagisa. It was sarcasm, something that he assumed Haru was very familiar with; “But I want some insurance as well, okay?”

“We can... play chess, if you'd like,” Haru offered. Humans always wanted to play chess with him.

“Nah, I mean that I want to come with you while you're collecting souls, so that I know that it's real,” Nagisa clarified.

“There are rules,” said Haru. He didn't need to explain that what Nagisa had just suggested would be going against them.

“Yeah, but you're, like, cosmic eternity or something. You could just delude me into thinking I was coming with you and then be on your way,” Nagisa replied.

“I could indeed do that,” said Haru, “I could even recreate you collecting the souls of your friends perfectly when the time comes. You would never know any different.”

“Sounds like a lot of effort to go to just to avoid bringing me along,” Nagisa said.

“Bringing you along would be a lot more effort,” Haru assured him.

“Really know how to compliment a guy, huh?” laughed Nagisa, “I guess you get a million of me every day. Bet you've had people asking to come with you hundreds of times before.”

“People have bartered with me many times, but you are the only you,” said Haru, “You are the only one who truly wants this in their soul. You are a first.”

There weren't a lot of firsts in Haru's career. By the nature of it, everything was as much the first as it was the last. Everything was the same.

Nagisa was not the same.

“That must put me in your favour?” Nagisa checked.

He gave Haru a wink. Haru responded to this by walking back towards Binky and climbing onto him, in a manner that made Binky seem a lot more like a horse than a seahorse. He didn't usually leave until the soul he was collecting had been safely escorted to their designated afterlife. But he knew that Nagisa wasn't going to make it that easy.

Within moments, Nagisa had climbed up behind him and wrapped his arms around Haru's waist. There was only a slight hesitation as Nagisa realised that there was nothing for him to actually hold onto. Though as soon as Nagisa reminded himself that he was imagining Haru with a physical form, it became true. There was a Haru for him to hold onto.

Perhaps once Nagisa had settled in, Haru would show him his skeleton form, just to scare him. Because Nagisa enjoyed being scared. He enjoyed getting his thrills, as he would say. Haru would provide him with these thrills.

“Anything I need to know before we set off?” Nagisa asked.

“Keep your limbs inside eternity as we travel through the space between reality. I will not go back for any that drop off because you stuck your head out too far. And yes, I do include your head in that statement,” said Haru.

He felt Nagisa's grip around him tighten.

“And how do I know this is real...?” said Nagisa.

“Because as soon as I take you on, you'll know everything,” said Haru, “I can tell you now that you'll instantly be wishing that you didn't. This is your last chance to change your mind. Once we leave, once you become a concept, you can never go back.”

Haru already knew that Nagisa wouldn't change his mind.

“This seems like the most interesting place to be...” mumbled Nagisa. He was nervous, but determined all the same; “Besides, you seem kinda boring. The universe could do with a fun grim reaper, y'know?”

There was no response to that. Haru believed that he was above petty human notions such as being insulted, but there was part of him that... felt that way. Perhaps for this one, Haru would indulge in some feelings.

He took hold of Binky's reins and watched as he reared up. The tiny figure of Nagisa clung onto him with all of his might and then... they were gone. Galloping off into the unknown. The only sound was a distant scream as Nagisa become one with eternity and instantly wished that he hadn't. But the scream faded out. Nagisa would calm down. He would come to revel in what he'd become in a way that only someone who had once been human could find excitement. Nagisa would create change in an eternity where Haru had never known change. So even if it meant that Haru had to maintain being Haru for a while longer, until Nagisa was prepared to accept that sometimes Haru needed to be death, without that word being capitalised, Haru would endure. Because he... wanted this. Perhaps there was part of him that felt human, too.

The car continued to smoke quietly against the cliff. It now contained only a body, but nothing else. The true Nagisa would never look back.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa is collecting a soul without Haru for the first time. And of course the soul Nagisa chooses to collect is none other than Rei's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Rei's birthday I decided to add another chapter to my Halloween fic, because why not? There might be one more chapter for this fic added down the line, but after that I'll call it done. Because as fun as grim reaper AU is, I don't need another massive, sprawling multichapter project in the works right now.

In all regards, Rei felt that he'd lived a good life. He was in his forties now, he was married, he had two pet dogs, he had a steady and respectable job with the prospect of promotion. Although rather... he'd had the prospect of promotion until about two minutes ago. But that aside, despite some of the earlier struggles that he'd gone through, including losing perhaps the most important person to him during his teenage years, Rei had managed well.

Rei hadn't devoted much thought to how it was all going to end. After that Halloween night all those years ago, during which Nagisa had left them through a car crash, Rei had eventually reached the conclusion that the best thing he could do was keep living in the moment. As Nagisa had done. As Nagisa... would have wanted him to.

But if he was thinking about it realistically, given his occupation, dying in a lab explosion wasn't the most surprising way that he could have gone. The room was a smoking mess. He'd been working overtime, but he still hoped that someone would come along to find what was left of his body soon. It was now lying on the opposite side of the room, in a position that no one could ever come back from. Certainly not Rei.

Perhaps the most irritating part for Rei was that he'd been wrong about the afterlife. As a man of science, Rei had never believed in it at all. You died and then that was it. Except that... Rei had died now and he was still here. It was never nice to learn that you were wrong, even if the end result was that you were better off than you would have been if you were right.

“Don't worry! It's not that you were wrong, I just forced what I wanted onto you, okay? If it had been down to you, this would've been over as soon as your body hit that wall, Rei.”

That voice... Rei hadn't heard it since...

...He turned around to be faced with someone he hadn't seen in... far too long. Nagisa looked both everything and nothing like how Rei remembered him. On that night when he'd left to go to another party in the next town over and Rei had decided not to go with him. To this day, Rei wasn't sure if he regretted that choice or not. But Nagisa was still dressed in those awful pumpkin bloomers, he still had a huge smile on his face and his whole being was as bright as the sun. But he was also... different somehow. He was missing an eye, for one thing.

Nagisa must have noticed him looking, because he tapped the hole where his eye had once been.

“What, this? No need to worry about that,” Nagisa assured him, “Haru got sick of having to go back and collect bits of me when I kept sticking my limbs outside of the seahorse. So one time he left my eye behind to make a point. I'm not ruling out that he might give it back to me someday.”

Rei did not understand a single word of what had just been said. Nagisa knew this and laughed loudly.

“Oh man, you've never changed! Even though it must've been a long time, huh? Haru was right that time doesn't exist between reality. How old even are you now, Rei?” Nagisa asked.

“Forty-two...” Rei answered. It was strange to think that was the first thing he was saying to Nagisa after such a long time.

Nagisa whistled; “Lookin' good for forty-two. Though I can't say that I'm surprised. I was hoping that you'd be doing well. The last thing I wanted was for you to live your life all sad because of what happened to me.”

“Yes... I was sad for a long time, but then I figured... that wouldn't be what you wanted. It's good to know that I was right, even if I am finding out after the fact,” said Rei, “So... this is it? This is... death?”

“Of course it is! But that's boring. We have all eternity to talk about death,” Nagisa dismissed, “If you get Haru on the topic, he never shuts up. I'd much rather talk about your life, Rei. Because I wanted to watch it, but I've just been so busy learning how not to mess stuff up and then the next thing I knew, I was here. You're my first solo soul collection, you know?”

“I'm honoured. Did you... pick me to be your first?” Rei asked.

“You already know the answer to that once,” said Nagisa, with a wink. When Rei came over all flustered, Nagisa laughed, but pressed on, “But come onnn! Tell me about you! Tell me about the person who Rei became.”

To hear Nagisa whine at him to hurry up again... Despite all of the many questions Rei had about his current situation, he chuckled.

“All right, I won't keep you in suspense. Though I must confess that, without you, I lived the boring life that you'd probably expect,” Rei said, “After what happened to you at the party... well, it was probably for the best that I was part way through studying for my degree at the time, because it meant that I had no choice but to shelf my grief for a while to study. If I didn't have something else to focus on, I would have fallen apart. Which was probably why I hurried into a job soon after leaving university. But I didn't hurry into much else. I became... comfortable and for a while, that was enough.”

“Didn't you get lonely?” Nagisa asked. He already knew the answer, but unlike Haru, he knew that talking to people was more satisfying if you pretended that you didn't.

“Yes... I was always very lonely,” Rei replied, “It wasn't that I didn't have friends. Makoto, Gou and Rin stuck by me, especially after what happened, but being in Iwatobi... it reminded me too much of you. So I transferred to abroad for a while, thinking it would be good for me. It was perhaps the most adventurous thing I'd ever done.”

Nagisa was practically bouncing on his feet with anticipation for the next part.

“And then you found love?” he prompted.

“Not that quickly. But in time, yes...” Rei admitted.

He walked over to where a photo frame had been blasted away from his desk along with him. The glass was shattered, but somehow the picture inside had survived. It showed Rei standing next to an American man with wild hair and glasses. Their two dogs jumping up at them. They couldn't get the dogs to stay still for the photo, but Rei always thought it made the image feel more true to their life.

“He's pretty!” Nagisa complimented, from where he was floating next to Rei's shoulder.

“Hibiki...” said Rei, “It actually helped to be with someone who wasn't connected to what happened. In time I told him about you and how you were my first love, but then, I wasn't his first love either. We didn't put too many expectations on each other, never truly believing the relationship to go that far. But then eventually we just... worked. I don't think either of us expected to get married, but here we are. He's going to be very cross with me when he realises that I died in an explosion...”

“Aww, you'll have to apologise to him when he dies,” Nagisa dismissed. It was no big deal in his eyes.

“Do I... get to see him?” Rei asked.

“If you want to. I did kinda come here to ask if you wanted to come with me,” Nagisa admitted, “I'm going to ask Makoto someday as well. But man, Makoto's not due to die for a long time!”

“You said before that time doesn't exist,” Rei pointed out.

“I know, right? And I still get impatient!” huffed Nagisa, “Anyway, Haru's not happy about it, but he also wants me out of his skull sometimes, so he agreed to let me bring you along for this if you want. I promise it's much more fun than what you were going to do when you died if I didn't show up - which was nothing. You're such a stubborn non-believer that I had to work hard to warp your fate enough to get in here. Good thing you believe in me, huh?”

“I... I suppose it is,” Rei agreed, “You keep mentioning this Haru... Who are they?”

“Oh, Haru is Death. Like, all of it. Sometimes without a capital letter, even,” answered Nagisa, “But I call him Haru because I like it more. And he likes me a lot, even though he won't admit it yet. He's kind of a work in progress.”

Rei shook his head; “Only you could befriend the grim reaper, Nagisa.”

“Well... other people could too, if they tried hard enough,” Nagisa insisted, “I'm hoping that you and Makoto can become friends with him as well.”

“If you like him, then it leaves me with no doubt that I will as well,” said Rei.

“Okay, so... that's settled then. Come on,” Nagisa said. He waved his hand and began to walk away.

“Just like that?” Rei asked.

When Nagisa turned back, he realised that Rei was still standing in the same spot, looking over at him curiously. Haru had said that Nagisa needed to work on his bedside manner. Just because Nagisa adapted to being dead easily didn't mean that everyone else did. So Nagisa walked back over and took Rei's hand.

“You don't have to come if you don't want to. But I kind of already know you do,” said Nagisa, “Once you become death, you kind of... know everything. Which is sad, because I know that's not what you like. You'd rather figure things out for yourself. And I guess there's still a degree of that? But it's not going to be easy to adapt for you. Even if you'll take to it super well once you pick it up.”

“And you've already seen that?” Rei checked.

“Yes...” said Nagisa, shuffling his feet awkwardly.

“So you've already seen what becomes of... us?” Rei asked.

Nagisa nodded; “You're worried right now about what going with me will mean for you and your husband. I don't need to know everything to know that about you, Rei. But it won't mean anything, honestly. Relationships a human construct just as much as time is. You can still stick with him and even bring him along once he dies, though you'll have a while to wait for him. If he's up for it, I'd go with both of you, though I know it'll be more complicated than that. Besides, I'm kind of halfway involved with Haru right now? He wouldn't mind whatever I got up to with you guys, but I like to keep my options open for if I can worm my way into his skeletal non-heart someday.”

From anyone else, all of what was just said would be too far. But coming from Nagisa, it sounded exactly what Rei would expect. Perhaps going into this agreeing that there were no strings attached seemed dishonest, but it was also... well, Rei and Nagisa's relationship was never normal to begin with.

He looked down at the photo by his feet. Hibiki didn't even know that Rei was dead yet...

“...I'd like to come collect him when he passes. Whatever he decides,” Rei said.

“That sounds like you. So are you coming or what?” Nagisa cheered.

“I'm coming,” Rei said. That was his choice.

And then the two of them were gone. With nothing but the useless sound of a smoke alarm overhead and the distant whinny of a seahorse that was trying to sound like a horse.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the end, Nagisa can't bring himself to collect Makoto's soul. So he leaves Haru with the task of bringing Makoto back to him. And yet there are still a lot of answers that Nagisa doesn't have, despite the apparent infinite knowledge. Once Makoto arrives, Nagisa decides to confront Haru about... everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The third and final chapter of grim reaper AU! Thanks for joining me on this short journey into trying something completely different. It was a lot of fun and I definitely hope that I can write NagiHaru again sometime, although probably in a more canon setting next time.

Haru would like to say that it took him by surprise when Nagisa asked him to collect Makoto's soul on Nagisa's behalf, but in truth, Haru knew the reason. Makoto's death wasn't going to be like Rei's or even that of Rei's partner, who had already joined them. Because Makoto was not a young man dying in a car crash like Nagisa was or even a middle-aged man dying in a lab explosion like Rei was.

Makoto was... very old.

He had lived a long time, in a life full of friends and family who had mostly all left the world before Makoto himself had done. No one except for Haru knew why Makoto had held on so long, but he had remained until not even he could do so any longer. Nothing lasted forever. Even death itself only lasted as long as something existed to die, be it the mightiest of rulers or the lowliest of plants. Once everything had ended, there would be no death to be had and Haru had already seen this come to pass in the eternity of non-linear existence.

A mere human like Makoto would not outlast all of that, but he had outlasted many who deemed him important in his own circle. Nagisa was one of those people. Which was why collecting Makoto's soul had proven too difficult for him. Once Haru delivered Makoto to eternity, in all likelihood Makoto would choose to appear younger once again. But this old, lonely Makoto was far too much for Nagisa to handle. Because as well as Nagisa had taken to his fate (easily the best of all these former-humans), he was, at the end of the day, still a person. He couldn't let go of the part of himself that had once been.

So when Nagisa came to Haru and asked him to do this, Haru agreed. Because he would have done it anyway. He was always there, even when he wasn't there.

The Makoto who greeted Haru was alone in a bed at home, with photos of his loved ones all around him. His hair was white, his body was almost wasted away, but his eyes were as kind and sad as they had already been. He knew that this was the end, but he greeted it with acceptance. After all, he'd had a life that was much fuller than many of the people who he'd known, even if watching the others go before him hadn't been easy.

When Makoto locked eyes with Haru, he didn't get out of the bed right away. His soul had detached from his body already, but to Makoto, it didn't feel like it had done. So he lay there and gave Haru a welcoming smile, as if he was the one who was about to take Haru somewhere and not the other way around.

“I've been waiting for you,” said Makoto. He already knew what Haru was; “Though I never expected you to look so much like him... Or at least, what I expected him to look like if he'd gotten to that age. Are you... him?”

“No,” Haru replied, “This is the form that Nagisa gave me. He also named me Haru. This too is coincidence and a trick of his subconscious.”

“Of course... it'd be too much to ask for anything else,” Makoto sighed, “But can I at least ask you if he's... gone to a good place? If all of them have?”

“The young boy Haruka Nanase is exactly where his soul wanted to be. He is out in the ocean with his grandmother and he is at peace. He will not come back,” answered Haru, “As for Nagisa, he has been a thorn in my side for a while. You will see him soon, as I have been instructed to take you to him and it is more interesting for everyone involved if I fulfil his requests. Rei and Hibiki Ryuugazaki are both also there with him.”

Of course when Haru described the fate of “the real” Haru, Makoto became sad and distant for a moment. But he hid it, in the way that Makoto had spent a lifetime hiding his innermost feelings.

“I see... It's just like Nagisa to boss around even death, isn't it? He was... always very bright,” Makoto said, “I've missed him maybe the most, since it's been the longest. Seeing him again, seeing even a few of them again, it'll make everything worth it.”

If Haru left Makoto to his own devices, he would fall into silence now. And as much as Haru had endless patience, Nagisa did not. So he pressed on, asking the question that Makoto wanted him to ask.

“If it makes you feel more comfortable, I don't have to appear in this form,” he said, “Even around the others, I don't have to appear to you as I do to them.”

As much as Haru knew the answer to that offer before even Makoto himself did, he was learning from Nagisa that sometimes it was better to pretend that you didn't know everything. Makoto stared at Haru, truly stared at him, and reached his decision.

“At least for the moment, it's too much,” Makoto said, “I would prefer it if you didn't appear as him for me.”

In the next instant, Haru was no longer a conventionally attractive young man with dark hair and piercing blue eyes. He was a skeleton in a robe, as many people liked to imagine him. Though at the core of his eye sockets, pale blue lights gently shone through the black. Some of Haru remained. From now on, some of Haru would always remain.

“Is this better?” he asked, knowing that it was much worse.

Makoto nodded; “I can deal with this. In fact... I feel like I'm ready to deal with all of it.”

With that, Makoto stood up to his impressive full height. He felt stronger now than he had done in many years, even if it was but an illusion. As he left the bed he turned to look to his body, but his eyes only lingered there for a second, before moving onto the photos all around him. All of the people who Makoto continued to care for, even after they were gone. Even after he too was gone.

“I miss them every day...” he said.

“Some of them you will continue to miss,” Haru warned.

“I know. But if I can have a few of them back, that will be more than I've had for too long,” replied Makoto, “Although I do feel bad for whoever finds my body. There's not many left, but I assume someone will eventually.”

“Your one of niece's daughters will find you on a regular check up,” answered Haru, “The one from Ren's side of the family. Interestingly, you're the first one to ask that. None of the others were that concerned about who found them.”

“Well, Rei and Nagisa always did live in the moment. I suppose I always lived in the past...” Makoto admitted.

“Now you can exist whenever you want,” said Haru. Talk of time always filled him with a vague sense of irritation, as if the universe was waiting for him to slip up.

“I think I want to exist wherever or whenever you're taking me,” Makoto replied.

“That is a good choice.”

Binky made his presence known, appearing in Makoto's line of sight. He neighed softly as Haru mounted and they both had to wait before Makoto would follow Haru's example, because by Makoto's logic, Binky was an animal. Within moments, Makoto was in front of them, softly stroking the side of Binky's face.

“So beautiful...” Makoto whispered, “But are you a horse or a... seahorse?”

“Binky is both. Everything and nothing,” Haru replied, “I just happen to like seahorses.”

“You sound more like the Haru I remember than you probably mean to,” Makoto said.

With that, he gave Binky a pat, before going around to sit behind Haru. As he wrapped his arms around Haru's waist, they became younger and firmer. Makoto was returning to the Makoto who he wanted to be. Which, as was the case for most people who lived to old age, was a version of himself from the prime of his life. If Haru was to look back now, he'd see that Makoto's hair would have become brown and his skin would no longer be wrinkled. Though his eyes would be as kind and sad as always.

Haru, on the other hand, remained a skeleton. That was what Makoto had asked of him.

The two of them left with little fuss. Makoto held on tighter than Nagisa had done as they travelled between reality. They could have been there in an instant, but Haru liked to give people a journey, because it was what they expected. Once he'd deemed that enough time had passed for Makoto to feel satisfied with the journey, they appeared where the others would be. In this... place that Haru had designed.

Before Nagisa, there was no point in Haru having a home. But Nagisa needed one, so one had came to be. It was of Nagisa's own design, even if Nagisa himself didn't realised that. It had formed based on the expectations Nagisa had for what a grim reaper's house would look like and had changed slightly both when Rei arrived and then when Hibiki had arrived. Makoto's presence had seen to it that the house had changed once again – there were black deer with blank, white eyes roaming around the large garden now. Haru decided that he liked them. They were considerably calmer than Nagisa's contributions.

And speaking of Nagisa, he was there in an instant, bounding joyfully over, with the other two following behind him.

“Makoto! Makoto's here! Hey, Makoto! Do you remember me? Woah, you look really good, huh? I'm glad you wanted to go back to being young and hot again,” Nagisa chimed.

He reached Binky and dived into Makoto's arms, knocking them both off. Haru dismounted more gracefully and gave Binky a reassuring pat, since the sudden Nagisa had set him on edge.

“Hey there, Nagisa... You look, well, exactly how I remember,” Makoto replied, holding onto him from where they'd landed bundled together on the ground.

“He won't take those bloomers off, no matter how many times I ask him to change into something else,” said Rei, who had reached them now, “...Hello, Makoto. It's good to see you again.”

“You too, Rei. And you, Hibiki,” Makoto said, easing both himself and Nagisa back onto his feet, “This is all a lot to take in, but it looks like you guys have gotten used to it.”

“Yep! We're all experts!” Nagisa chimed.

Rei and Hibiki exchanged a glance that said they weren't sure that they agreed with Nagisa on that matter, but didn't know how to break that to him. That told Makoto everything he needed to know – Nagisa had adjusted swimmingly to whatever this afterlife was, but the other two would still need time. Makoto himself would still need time.

But when Makoto looked back at Nagisa, he was greeted with an expression that he'd never seen from him before. For a very brief moment, Nagisa looked almost exactly like Haru had done when he appeared as a human. Actually, no... for a very brief moment, Nagisa's face had been just a skull. And then it was gone. He was exactly as he had been before, save for the fact that he seemed to be missing an eye. He gave Makoto a nervous little laugh that, again, didn't sound like Nagisa.

“Guess you saw that, huh?” Nagisa mumbled.

...Then there was just Nagisa and Makoto. Rei, Hibiki, even Haru and Binky were nowhere to be seen. Makoto gasped and stared around them wildly.

“Don't worry, I'll bring them back in a sec and they won't know any different, but I wanted to talk to just you for a moment,” Nagisa said, “Look, I kind of... know everything now. I know that you and the others won't pick this up as fast and that you'll mostly just stay in the house for a while. So I wanted you to know that, well, that's okay. It's through my selfish wishes that you and Rei are here at all. Hibiki is only here because Rei wanted him to be, though I've gotta admit that he's a pretty fun guy deep down and I'm glad Rei married someone like him. But yeah, I know that... none of you are the same as me.”

Nagisa looked so sad in that moment... Makoto walked forward and put his arms around him, cradling him like he knew Nagisa needed. Because Makoto didn't need to have infinite knowledge to know what Nagisa needed.

“I'm glad you brought me here,” Makoto soothed, “I'm glad that I get to spend eternity with people who I care about. Thank you...”

“No, thank you...” Nagisa sighed.

He pulled away from Makoto's embrace and then the next moment, the house, the garden and everyone else was back again. As if nothing had happened. Makoto had to act as if that was the case.

“Oh man, now everyone needs to help Makoto get settled!” Nagisa announced, “I bet he's got a real nice room here, with lots of photos and maybe even a pool. Rei's room came with dogs, so I bet your has complimentary cats in as well, Makoto! You should go find out.”

“I guess I should,” agreed Makoto, “Though I don't know where to go.”

Nagisa waved his hand dismissively; “The glasses crew over here will show you. Y'know, they both choose to have glasses, even though they could magically have perfect vision here. Weird, huh? Anyway, I'll let you guys get on and I'll go find Haru to see what we're having for dinner. He acts like he forgets that people like to have food, even if we don't need it here. Honestly, Haru's pretty rude.”

Now that their attention had been drawn to it, Makoto realised that Haru was no longer there. He assumed that Nagisa would know where to find him. He also assumed that... Nagisa wanted to be alone with him. Was that what this was all about? Makoto smiled knowingly down at Nagisa and when Nagisa pouted back up at him in response, Makoto had his answer.

“All right, I'll go on ahead and find my room,” Makoto said, “It'll be good to catch up with these two again anyway. I haven't seen them since, well, before they died.”

“A lot has happened since then,” said Rei. Then just before Nagisa turned away, Rei added, “...And good luck, Nagisa. You know we support you in your choices.”

“I know that. And... thanks,” Nagisa replied.

Because Nagisa already knew that. Haru had... made Nagisa like him. More so than any of the others. He'd done it because Nagisa had asked him to, while the others had merely followed Nagisa's lead. The end result was that Nagisa had become different to them, even if they would all pretend otherwise for the rest of eternity. And for the most part, they'd all be fine with that.

But right now... Nagisa needed Haru.

So he bid the others farewell for now and disappeared through the cracks in reality, to a different part of this fictional house.

The most logically place for Haru to be would be in the stable, putting Binky to rest. However, that wasn't where Nagisa wanted him to be. He took advantage of the fact that he could make Haru be anywhere and he decided that the drawing room was best. The others would not disturb them for a while - the universe would see to that.

...And there he was, sitting at his desk as Nagisa wanted him to be. Waiting for Nagisa to talk with him, his face that of a handsome young man and his eyes like the ocean. Again, as Nagisa wanted. Despite everything, that annoyed Nagisa no end. Haru would mould reality exactly as Nagisa wanted, with no questions asked. But even so... Haru had been selfish as well.

“We don't even have to have this conversation,” Nagisa pointed out.

“Talking makes you feel human,” said Haru, “Pretending makes you feel human.”

“But that's not what you want,” Nagisa replied, “You should have no wants at all and yet...”

“...I do,” Haru finished, “And you, only you, know why I have them.”

“Because of me...” Nagisa sighed, “Because when you made me part of you, it also made you part of me. I've... made you human. At least a little. But I hate that! I hate that you did this to yourself and yet you still act like you were before.”

“Forgive me for not figuring out how to act yet,” Haru said, bluntly.

“You know everything. You should know how to act,” insisted Nagisa.

“Knowing and doing are not the same. The part of me that is you makes me... hesitate. I have never felt hesitation before, even when I believed that I knew it. So many of these emotions that have only been described to me in a disconnected way... Can you blame me for not knowing how to handle them?” asked Haru.

“I guess not... But I can blame you for agreeing to this in the first place,” huffed Nagisa, “Why did you do it? Why didn't you just tell me that you'd take me with you and then shove me off into my afterlife like everyone else? You say that I should know everything, but I don't know the answer to that, Haru!”

“You do know. You know that I was intrigued by you,” Haru insisted.

“That's not good enough,” said Nagisa, “There has to be more.”

At that, Haru stood to his feet. The room around them disappeared and was replaced by a void that grew darker and more stifling with each passing second. It radiated from Haru. It was his anger and Haru had never experienced anger before. It was wild in a way like no anger had been and it didn't know how to behave. Haru didn't know what to do with it. When he spoke again, his voice somehow felt both loud and quiet at the same time, as if even that didn't know what to be right now.

“You are the only being in the universe who has looked upon Death and said that there has to be more,” Haru stated, “You are the only one like you, Nagisa Hazuki. If I let you slip away, then I would have felt regret!”

Nagisa walked boldly forward, despite how scared he was. He placed a hand on the front of Haru's robes and shook his head.

“No, Haru... you wouldn't have felt regret. Because you wouldn't understand what regret was to feel,” he said, “I gave you regret. It looks like... in the end, I gave you more than you gave me. Neither of us planned for that. Not even you.”

The atmosphere grew lighter, the room returned. The anger had passed.

“Perhaps you are right...” said Haru. And Nagisa could tell Haru was also experiencing shame for the first time.

“So you gotta know why I'm asking, right? It doesn't make sense for you to do what you did. Me not knowing the answer makes me feel like... maybe you don't know it either and that's kind of annoying,” said Nagisa, “But then you were kind of annoying from the start, so maybe that's just it.”

“If I picked out a human to spend eternity with based on the compliments they gave, it wouldn't have been you,” Haru assured him.

“Huh. Looks like you even have a sense of humour now,” mused Nagisa, “But, come on! Give me something! Even if you don't have an answer, just... make one up.”

“So you can tell me off for lying?” Haru said.

“If you don't give me something, I'll just keep bugging you,” warned Nagisa.

“Trust me, I know,” Haru promised, “But I can only tell you what I've already been telling you all along – there is only one of you. And you intrigue me, Nagisa. Even back then, my interest in you was something unknown to me and I wanted... to see more. You were the first selfish choice of a being that should not even have a concept of self. You will be my last selfish choice and all of the ones in between. You give me... so many emotions, though being part of me and... otherwise.”

“Jeez... have we... kind of fucked up reality here?” Nagisa asked, rubbing the back of his head.

“Yes,” said Haru.

“Is it worth that?”

“...Yes.”

The two of them looked at each other, knowing everything and especially knowing the confusion that they both felt. The universe was in bad hands with Haru and Nagisa, yet neither of them cared all that much. Out of all the humans who could become one with the concept of death, Nagisa was the most haywire choice. It was going to be crazy from here on out. Perhaps because of this, it would always have been crazy. Time was an illusion, after all.

But what the two of them felt for each other, at least to Nagisa, was not an illusion. Nagisa looked across at Haru, who was so lost in these very human feelings, and he understood that in this, Nagisa was the expert. He would have to guide Haru through them, because that was what Haru needed him to do. Haru who had... done everything for the sake of others before now. Nagisa would have to teach Haru how to be selfish.

Good thing that Nagisa was the best person for that.

He took his hand off the front of Haru's robes and instead wrapped his arms around him, as Makoto had done with Nagisa before. Then he felt Haru return the gesture. It was the first time that he'd done anything like that. The hands that settled on Nagisa's back were bone, but he realised that... he didn't mind. Nagisa didn't fall in love with Death for an experience he could get from anywhere else, after all.

“Hey, so... when we met, you told me that you were the wildest of times,” Nagisa whispered, “I feel like I'm ready to experience that now.”

“I feel like... I am ready to experience that as well,” Haru replied.

The room disappeared. They disappeared. It would be a while before they joined the others for dinner. But then again, they had all of eternity to get there.


End file.
